How to Navigate Divorce As a Stay-at-Home Parent

As a stay-at-home parent, your divorce will likely look different than if you were working outside of the home. From finding a job to adjusting to new routines, here’s how to navigate divorce as a stay-at-home parent.

Document Everything 

Start keeping track of all the things that you do for the home and for the kids. This will be important in your divorce case because it shows the type of value that you bring to the relationship and the family’s core. You already know what you do and your spouse likely knows what you do, but by documenting it, you are creating concrete evidence of that. When you’re learning how to navigate divorce as a stay-at-home parent, you’ll quickly learn that documenting everything is valuable and will allow you to have proof. 

“You already know what you do and your spouse likely knows what you do, but by documenting it, you are creating concrete evidence of that. “

Be Clear on Financials

If you’ve let your spouse handle all the financial aspects of your lives, now is the time to stop. Learn about your financial situation, what you can do about it, and what you even have access to. Starting this before you get too far into the divorce process can protect you from getting frozen out of accounts and information. It’s a good idea to also know where your credit stands and what, if anything, you need to do to fix it. 

It’s a good idea to open your own bank account now. Many stay-at-home parents rely on a joint account with their spouse, but it may be difficult to go through a divorce sharing an account. It’s easy to start a bank account and doing so will allow you to take one of the first steps toward your new, independent life! 

Do Your Research 

Find out what you might be entitled to as a stay-at-home parent. Do research on settlements, alimony laws in your area, child support, and your rights to the marital home. Knowing a little about all of these things before working with a divorce professional can help set expectations. It will also help you know what you might want to gain from the divorce. 

Always Use Professionals 

From finances to transition assistance and even mediation, it’s important to always use professionals. The outcome of your divorce case could suffer if you use someone who is not a professional or you rely only on advice that comes from friends. Getting professional help may make it easier for you to figure out how to navigate divorce as a stay-at-home parent. 

Update Your Resume 

While job searching is not at the top of your priority list during a divorce, there will be a time when you’ll have to start looking for a job. In fact, it may even be in your divorce agreement that you find employment! To get a jump start on this, start updating your resume. This can be especially difficult if you have been out of the workforce for many years. Be sure to list any relevant experience you’ve had in the past and highlight how it applies to current job opportunities. Remember that volunteer experience – such as with the PTA or as a kid’s team coach – can be valuable on your resume too! 

Have a Plan 

Start coming up with a plan as soon as you begin thinking about divorce. By preparing ahead, you’ll know how to navigate divorce as a stay-at-home parent. Don’t plan for the actual divorce, though. Instead, focus on what your life is going to look like after the divorce. How will you spend your time with your children? Will you need to rely on childcare after going back to work? What type of work schedule will you be looking for? By answering these questions ahead of time, you will know exactly what to look for post-divorce. 

Bring Joy Back In 

You’ve been something to someone else for years now: a parent, a spouse, someone to clean, cook, and cart the kids around. It’s easy to let this be your only identity, but divorce is the perfect time to change that. You’re likely going to be spending more time to yourself so get to know yourself a little better. Find the things that once brought you joy. Pick up a new hobby. Or, get serious about another goal: your health or even a side hustle! Transitioning from part of a couple into an individual is one of the most exciting parts of divorce! 

Are you ready for a divorce? Worried about what that will look like as a stay-at-home parent? Let us guide you through the process and talk about your options for a better divorce! Contact us for a strategy session.